Jenny and I recently bought a car. It’s equipped with what have become standard safety features, such as airbags and antilock brakes, as well as the Knight-Riderish capability of being able to call 911 for you if you get into an accident.
Sidebar: Does anyone else feel awkward when listening to radio commercials for OnStar? Those conversations seem like they should remain private.
Safety comes first even in the trunk, where we discovered this:
Judging by the fist-pumping action of the dude in the drawing, you pull this tab if you’ve been abducted by a mob henchman, and he’s made the classic error of locking you in the trunk before rubbing you out.
Unfortunately, I don’t know whether I’ll be able to appreciate the irony of having made the preceding, smart-ass statement if I’m ever in a position to need this functionality.