Oh, if only the world were so lucky.
No, I’ve recently become infatuated with creating these fake greeting cards for four reasons:
1) People seem to think they’re funny. I know all of you aren’t wannabe humor writers like me, but take my word for it, this is key.
2) Maybe, just maybe, I’ll one day be able to combine these cards into one of those novelty humor books that seem a whole hell of a lot easier to sell than actual humor books. Case in point: Denis Leary’s Suck on This Year, which is just a compilation of some of his Tweets. I mean, who wouldn’t want to be able to tear out the fifth-grade graduation card and give it to his or her favorite niece or nephew?
3) Speaking of Tweets, mine are taking most of the material that I previously would’ve used for my shorter blog posts. And I suppose I just admitted much of what I’ve written on this blog could’ve been done in 140 characters or less. I don’t think any of us are surprised by that.
4) In general, I can’t write with the TV on, but I can make these cards while simultaneously reveling in the glory of Fashion Police on E! That pretty much speaks for itself, as does host Joan Rivers, who is like live-action Family Guy.
So, in sum, I’m not abandoning the comedic musings that have made this blog, I don’t know, an Internet sensation, but I am going to try and keep pumping out these cards.
I’m hoping that this will allow me to keep a more regular posting schedule; my plan is to (try to) put something new up each Monday and Friday, despite what today being Saturday might otherwise suggest.
And now, allow me to close this unnecessary explanation of what’s going on in the dining room office by saying that if any of you have ideas for a topic for a card (thank you, happy anniversary, you have BO, etc.) that you’d like to see made, please suggest it in the comments and do some of my work for me.
Ahh, the power of social media.