Guarantee this happened at least once: “You think my name’s crazy? Have you met my VP? Schuyler Colfax? I’m not even sure how I’m supposed to pronounce that, and I’m the guy’s boss.
“Alright, who’s doing shots?”
*Note: This post first appeared June 13, 2011. Why is it back? Because Ulysses S. Grant came to me in a dream last night and said he would talk up my You Know Who’s Awesome? book in the afterlife if I reposted it.