The Bracket of Bad Back-Window Family Stickers, Semifinal 1

Some of you may recall that back in March, I did a post that was simply this photo:

under the title “When Just Plain Tacky Isn’t Tacky Enough.”

I really can’t stand these back-window, hey-I-have-a-family stickers. In fact, I was quite happy when the folks at Adams, the publisher of You Know Who’s Awesome?, decided to use an illustration along these lines on the back cover of the book; few things convey the essence of why I’d sarcastically call someone or something “awesome” quite as well as one of these babies.

Since publishing that post, I’ve been on the lookout for different incarnations of this kind of decal so as to construct a “Final Four of Tacky” and let all of you decide which you think is worst.

Tragically, there are many, many more than four iterations of this sticker, so if you’re out and see a particularly heinous one, snap a photo and send it to me using the e-mail address here. If I receive enough, I’ll make a bigger bracket, allowing us to arrive at a more conclusive answer as to whose minivan is the most obnoxious.

In the meantime, I will present my own Final Four, starting today with the 1 vs. 4 seed matchup; 2 vs. 3 will come sometime in the next week or so, and then the “winners” will square off for the title of biggest loser.

Please register your vote for which decal is worse using the poll over on the left. You can also leave a comment to explain your rationale or just get some things off your chest, but only poll votes count toward determining which sticker offends our collective senses the most.

So, without further adieu, your 1 vs. 4 matchup:

1. Zombie Apocalypse


4. That’s a Lot of Mouse Ears

Now while my intention is to have you evaluate these on the family stickers, I can’t ask you to ignore the poop/toilet paper combo completely. I think of that one almost as the coach for the zombie family, and everyone knows you can’t discount good coaching.

After all, it could very well be the difference as the undead take on the happiest place on earth.

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